one of these things is not like the other

humdingers

Every now and then I will read what's new in an online magazine I love. Juked is one such magazine.

Here are two new things on Juked that lit dreams and landed whoas in me:

Gang, a story by Martin Cozza
Lovesick, a poem by Howard Good

i'm going to work for the new WPA and sing union songs in my unfettered mustache of grit

"Customers on IndyMac Federal Bank listen to Burbank Police Sgt. Matthew Ferguson's instructions as he reads names from a sign up sheet while they wait in line to pull as much money as they could from the failed financial institution in Burbank, Monday July 14, 2008. The bank was helping ten customers per hour and the list was at least couple of hundred names long soon after they opened their doors."

via AP

My new book about the economy's emotions will be called

HI NEW DEPRESSION WELCOME TO THE NEW DEPRESSION CAN I TAKE YOUR PANIC?

it's funny until someone gets hurt, then it's sophisticated

Five Star Literary Stories, an awesome site that reviews online fiction (Aaron Hellem's story from NOÖ was recently reviewed) just published Sharon McGill's review of my story "Ten Gallon Bucket of Fries," which appeared in WordRiot three years ago (holy shit). Ms. McGill's review is gracious and insightful. Many thanks to T.J Forrester for the site, Sharon McGill for the review, and Jackie Corley for originally publishing the story, which will be reprinted in Online Writing: The Best of the First Ten Years (I'm not sure if that's the best link).

Now look at the picture via Nadim Sabella.

nobody moves to perth

IS THERE LIGHT WHERE YOU ARE?

All the new bewilderment is about hay fever tablets.
In this it resembles the blind men running from the
elephant. In this it resembles nude appliance repair.
We're pulled aside and told we're loved, but listen:
the mustard gas has to go. If I keep feeling this way
I will have to use a lot of emoticons. I will have to
stop lying to my children about the history of blues.
No more oyster ice cream, illegal haircuts, arc welding.
Stricter regulations on confession distribution.
Stop with the codeine-in-the-milkshake "accidents."
All the old bewilderment was about jealousy between
umpires, twenty-seven facemasks dunked in blood,
piled in the sink. It seems like only yesterday
we hired these relationships, and now look at the
mics on us, even when we're not under emotion.
"I like that--is it new?" "No, we know someone who
already likes it." Now we're even sold our minutes.
We can talk on the phone in the handicap shower.
If I keep feeling this way, I will need a mitten
my whole body over. All the new bewilderment
mops in the blue hour and respects donuts,
dismantles the game into aesthetic experience.
We're rushed from the gym and told "Lay here
and dream of time machines very hard." Okay.
We're given six unlabeled jars and told "Pick
the new honey." That one. If I keep feeling this--
wearing, I mean, a pillowcase and a white belt--
we will drop the bones in the heart slot just to
buzz, buzz, even as we're not supposed to buzz.
I have invented a new kind of poetry that alludes
to Operation, which is also a new kind of feeling,
which was already our new kindness at work.
When the batteries run out, promise that you'll
melt me in my sleep and stir me up with blue acid.
Keep the lights on through all loss. Don't forget:
brilliant also means that none of us can see.

the french have a word for that

ALL THE GOOD PARTS GONE FOR LEGAL REASONS

I am walking through the basement
of an all womens' college dorm,
carrying my underwear, photos of a
duck & dolphin, and a sheet labeled
LITERATURE FOR ANDY. Here it's
midnight. Today I ate my share of
thunderstorms and hickory potatoes.
"Can I talk?" asked a 12 year old.
I said "Only if it's interesting"
and he said "By whose standards?"
Would you still love me if I were
awarded Most Likely to Applaud Too
Emotionally? You can have two
desserts, I don't care. I feel
______ because a 12 year old said
"If a poem has audience participation,
you should." We have to hire mollusks,
zombie Kenneth Kochs and @ signs to mop
up with whipped cream and cheese malice.
Go away if you're not happy. This is
Rule #1. Fun fact: I am very real,
and I have certain secrets of
cinnamon and ambulance and moss.
Now I am going to take a shower.

how do you pronounce noo journal

from QF's email:


Monday Night Book-B-Que at the Booksmith

Please join Quick Fiction and NOÖ Journal on Monday, June 23rd at Brookline Booksmith. We'll be grilling out back and enjoying some excellent readers and live music.


Monday, June 23rd
Brookline Booksmith
Brookline, Mass.
Food: 6:30 PM
Event: 7:00 PM

Myfanwy Collins has work published or forthcoming in Quick Fiction, The Kenyon Review, Cream City Review, Agni, Swivel, The Jabberwock Review, Saranac Review, Monkeybicycle, Mississippi Review, SmokeLong Quarterly, and other venues. Please visit her at www.myfanwycollins.com.

Patrick Duggan is originally from New Hampshire, and received a BFA in photography and literature from Emerson College in Boston, and an MFA in writing from California College of the Arts in San Francisco. He is editor and cofounder, along with Elliot Harmon and Marcus Merritt, of Idiolexicon, and his poems and articles have appeared in numerous journals, including Beeswax, Floating Holiday, Hazmat Review, Mirage, Monday Night Lit, NOÖ Journal, Parthenon West Review, Traffic, and 26 Magazine.

Gabe Durham lives in Northampton, Massachusetts. His writings have appeared at Daytrotter.com, Word Riot, Crate, and Expressionists. He gives away free words and music at www.gatherroundchildren.com.

Plus music from Yes, But Slowly.